The Second Sickness

I started writing again today because I feel…better? The third day of my second COVID tenure is underway. It served as a gentle reminder to force my fingertips to glide between the keys on my keyboard yet again. I listened to some tracks from Radiohead this afternoon as I soaked some sun up. Plus, I was watching this movie last night - Julie and Julia. It sheds light on two parallel stories derived from true stories of women who loved cooking. As the movie was still picking up, the protagonist tells her husband she has ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). I leaned forward, put my pillow in my lap and I let my elbows bear the weight of my racing thoughts. “Will this movie actually highlight ADD symptoms accurately?” was the only question resonating in here. I proceeded to almost cry at multiple points throughout the movie. The mental breakdowns, the impulsive quips, the dire need for deadlines and heaps of emotional turmoil summed up into one character made me think back to when I was diagnosed, barely a year ago.

I call ADD my second sickness because it prohibits me from doing what I can do or have to do. Out of all the sicknesses I’ve lived through, all the cuts that were stitched up (with and without anaesthesia) and all those accidents I’ve been through without a bruise or a scar, ADD is the one that hurts the most, and that’s because the pain is constant for the most part.

That is, if you’re not taking your meds. Let’s talk about meds on a different day. As of now, I’m gearing up to ease into the remainder of my day. It’s 4:20 PM (nice?) and I think I’ll listen to some new music albums before I go to bed tonight. To be fair, music is the only thing keeping me sane in times such as these. Let’s also talk about music on a different day. Let’s not let ADD win for once, right?

Call your loved ones this weekend. They’d appreciate it.

Until next time.